A few days ago, I blogged about a bad day for gays marriage. Today came a moment of sharp clarity that the tide is turning — one parent, coworker at at time.
“I just could not bring myself to tell an entire group of our community they were less important, less worthy or less deserving of the rights and responsibilities of marriage than anyone else, simply because of their sexual orientation.”
“Two years ago I believed that civil unions were a fair alternative … those beliefs, in my case, have changed. The concet of a separate but equal institution is not something I can support.”
“I want for them the same thing that we all want for our loved ones. For each of them to find a mate, whom they love deeply and who loves them back. Someone who they can grow old together and share life’s experiences.”
It’s something we’ve likely all seen. I know this is how it was with my own family. Parents who once awkwardly informed me that the couldn’t support gay marriage now won’t support a conservative candidate who campaigns against gays and lesbians. It absolutely has everything to do with the real life experience of knowing gays and lesbians, but it goes beyond that. I don’t think my mother would have changed her view point on gay marriage specifically if it wasn’t for her relationship with my partner, Shane. It takes more than just the knowledge that we’re gay. They have to see our lives in practice, including both how similar our lives mirror their own and in the unnecessary struggles that we face because we’re gay and lesbian.
3 Comments
Greg, I couldn’t agree more. People will change their minds about marriage equality when they see same sex couples in real life situations. This happens when couples are integrated into the fabric of mainstream society, as well as in their families. Homophobic prejudices slowly dissolve as we become humanized in the eyes of our families, neighbors, and coworkers.
… and this, my friends, is one of the major reasons LGBT people need to come out.
It can be a bit harder on those in relationships only because, like str8 couple, when we have found our mate we build a comfortable nest.
Next moth there is National Coming Out Day - Do it! No more excuses. I had a friend ask me what I was going to do on that day. My response: “Honey, I have no idea how much more out I can be” so instead my goal for this year will be to encourage every LGBT citizen to speak up and share their lives.
Greg: is The City Paper doing it’s big gay issue this October? If so I have a great article idea…. you know how to track me down.
It has been said that only Nixon Could Go To China and the same might be said for the support og same gender marriage.
I am a Log Cabin Republican and basically spend a lot of time (with my partner) meeting republicans at conventions etc. and telling them our story.
The easy struggle in Marriage Equality is going into a room where everyone supports you. The hard job is going into a room knowing that some hate you and you have to convert some by just being yourself. It is the one on one connection that will change people’s hearts and minds. My story is simple, I met and fell in love with my high school sweetheart when we were 16 and we are still together today, some 29 years later. My name is Kevin Norte and his name is Don Norte.
Thanks to Log Cabin Republicans and its president Patrick Sammon, who encouraged us to tell it simple. The stories are out there and are waiting to be told. As more are told, people’s minds are changing.
Sure right wing conservatives are blasting the Mayor of San Diego for flip flopping but their time has passsed and they know it inside.
The battle now is for the slightly right of the center and Log Cabin Republicans are there and i am gald to be on that team.